Would you try flying a plane without proper training? What about skydiving? Would you jump out of a plane after only a quick explanation? Premarital counseling is not “optional” to the wise. You are doing something you never did before. Starting your new marriage w/out premarital counseling is crazy! Start premarital counseling as early as possible. Or your chances for lifetime happiness are very small.
If you wanted to sail a boat would you want to just learn how to raise the sails and go. You may think you can handle the first set of waves. But that is a great way to die.
Getting out of the safe harbor of your courting and engagement changes everything. If you want to have a happy married life of clear sailing you need to be well prepared. Too many things, subtle things, change when you get married; even if you have been living together.
Many couples are choosing to live together first; it is about “try before you buy”. But this recent trend has its pitfalls. Studies show divorce statistics are no better for couples who began by living together. In fact, your chances are worse. “…couples who lived together before they tied the knot saw a 33 percent higher rate of divorce than those who waited to live together until after they were married.” Because The Marriage Foundation does not speculate (EVERYTHING we teach is based on science) we go back to the core issue:
Start Premarital Counseling to Make Your Marriage Great
When should you start premarital training? Why, as soon as possible, of course!
Let me share this fairly recent unedited request we got. It illustrates the point… “I am a newly wed. My husband and I were married on May 1st of this year, so it’s been 5 months and we make each other miserable. We argue a lot and it doesn’t feel like we are newlyweds at all. We also don’t have a healthy sex life and it seems like we are not in tune with each other. I don’t know what to do.”
I promise you her friends have no idea her new marriage is terrible. It is too embarrassing to marry your soulmate and then discover you have no idea how to be married. What is worse is that couples don’t know that lack of premarital counseling is their ONLY problem. They start blaming each other for everything. So it gets worse and worse. Soon they get resentful and discouraged. In many cases they are ruined for life; no longer able to open their hearts like they should.
Start premarital counseling as soon as you can. It will improve everything, even if you are still in the dreamy phase. Trust me. When you know what to do your marriage will be great, not just good.